“Vegetarians, and their Hezbollah-like splinter faction, the vegans, are a persistent irritant to any chef worth a damn. To me, life without veal stock, pork fat, sausage, organ meat, demi-glace, or even stinky cheese is a life not worth living. Vegetarians are the enemy of everything good and decent in the human spirit, and an affront to all I stand for, the pure enjoyment of food.” - Anthony Bourdain, “Kitchen Confidential,” p. 70
Tell us how you really feel, Anthony!
Of course, vegetarians and vegan chefs were not about to take this crude, carnivorous cri de coeur lying down, and thus was born Hezbollah Tofu, a blog where vegan chefs are systematically veganizing chef Bourdain’s most celebrated recipes. They plan on selling the resulting compilation, and donating the proceeds to vegan causes (farm sanctuaries, public education, etc) in Bordain’s name. Take that, Anthony!
This topic brings up a whole host of questions for me, as a Jew and as a self-professed foodie who also strives to eat sustainably (although not regularly animal-product free):
Read more »
First there were Smucker’s Uncrustables - the prefab PB&J sandwiches that resemble mini pot-pies and fit snugly (jam and all) in the toaster. Now, Kraft has introduced frozen Bagel-fuls that come pre-shmeared with cream cheese.
Really? PB&J and bagels with cream cheese are already the definition of “on the go” foods - is there really consumer demand to shave 30 seconds off the morning routine? And wouldn’t these convenience bagels actually take more time since they have to defrost?
More than that, I find Bagel-fuls to be a serious affront to the bagel’s integrity. There was a time when the bagel - crusty, chewy, and drowning in poppy seeds - rivaled challah as the quintessential Jewish bread. And while shrink-wrapped versions (like Lender’s) have already made a mockery of our beloved carb, Bagel-fuls truly represent a new low.
Fight back against this culinary offense - whether you’re partial to plain, scallion, or Toffuti, the right to shmear is yours.
Related bagel posts on The Jew & The Carrot
The Only Bagel
What’s so Jewish About Bagels?
Does it Work for a Knish Too?
Does a Bagel Platter Make us Hypocrites?
(Hat tip to My Jewish Learning)
I never replied to the comments on an older thread from Bravo for liberated day school teacher: “Bacon’s delish” in January, but I intended to and it’s never too late to blog.
Isaac congratulated me but brought up that “Judaism is my religious field for reasons that transcend choice.” I disagree. Perhaps the odds are not in your favor that you’ll leave Jewish identity behind completely. It will surely leave an impression on your life permanently. But you can renegotiate its particulars anytime you want. Kashrut or no kashrut, the right is yours.
RivkaK was shocked that un-kosher friends pretend to be kosher for their parents, but perhaps this is food for thought for Isaac. Kashrut is often familial turf which, outside it’s religious value, endears or estranges some of us from home. I’ll get that in a moment.
It seems anarchist lawyer didn’t like what I said, challenging me by asking “Don’t you think we have an obligation to our forbears to respect the traditions of the past?”
Read more »
As a card-carrying Jewish professional, I have the maddening responsibility of thinking two holidays ahead at all times. So while I am trying to put the finishing touches on our second annual (Fair Trade) Chocolate-Covered Tu Bishvat Seder, I’m also looking for a more sustainable vendor for the hot dogs for our Purim carnival. I can’t believe that after several years of serious progress (especially on the krunchy-kosher koasts), no one is selling a kosher organic hot dog yet. Even with some serious google-fu, this is the best I could come up with. Kosher organic chicken dogs. Blech. Maybe we’ll just go with these.
Any thoughts?
Progressive Magazine, Mother Jones, recently published an article denouncing conservative think-tank, The Heritage Foundation’s, recent report, “Hunger Hysteria: Examining Food Security and Obesity in America.” James Ridgeway at Mother Jones writes:
According to a November 13 Heritage article…there are no longer any hungry people in the United States…. Far from having too little to eat, they argue, poor people are eating too much.
“Hunger Hysteria” is the work of Robert Rector, Heritage’s senior domestic-policy man [who] argues that while the USDA’s numbers [of food insecurity in the US] might sound “ominous” on the surface, “the government’s own data show that the overwhelming majority of food insecure adults are, like most adult Americans, overweight or obese.”
I think I might lose my lunch.
Read more »
Yesterday, my co-worker came into the office and put a copy of the Jewish Daily Forward on my desk. The entire back page was filled with an advertisement, headed by the warning, “Kosher Food Safety Alert.” A few pointed blurbs followed, which exposed several health and safety violations against kosher meat producer, Agriprocessors. Included among them:
“Agriprocessors has been cited more than a dozen times between July 2006 and January 2007 by the USDA for fecal and bile contamination in one of its processing plants.”
“In 2006, the USDA FSIS has cited Agriprocessors more than five times for violations of “mad cow” safety rules.”
The ad, which was paid for by the United Food and Commercial Workers and also ran in The Jewish Week, did not specifically call for a mass boycott of Agriprocessor’s products (though it did warn customers shopping for Thanksgiving turkeys at Trader Joes to check for the Agriprocessors label). Perhaps this was a strategic move on the part of the UFCW in hopes of coming across as a source of information as opposed to a hot-headed activism-focused - and therefore easy to dismiss- organization.
Regardless, there’s also a practical reason not to call for a boycott - for many meat-eating kosher keepers, Agriprocessors is the only option.
Read more »
I’m going to out myself again as a newbie in the culinary and foodie world, but that’s my place on this here blog, so here we go. This morning I slept through all my alarms, both electronic and internal, due to the deep, deep sleep one gets when the body is fighting off a cold. Awaking late, I rushed out of bed, hit the subway, and ducked into the deli closest to work — only to find that breakfast was over, and only lunch food was about.
Thus this morning’s quandry: what do you eat for breakfast when you’re sick in New York City? Read more »
I recently heard an interview with Native artist Lawrence Paul Yuxweluptun during which he made a comment about the nature of food. He asked “When a Haida is eating a hotdog When does the hotdog become Haida (referring to the first nations band)? When it’s in his hand? When it’s in his mouth? or after he’s had a bowel movement.” Yuxweluptun was using this image as a metaphor for many cultural dilemmas. I ended up stuck on the Koan-like statement for a while trying to grapple with what about the metaphor hit me. I think it stems from the possibility of thinking about it from a literal perspective and then approach food and culture differently. When does what we eat become who we are, if it even ever does.
Read more »
CSA advocates will tell you that joining a Community-Supported Agriculture project is the next best thing to growing your own food. You support a farmer for a whole season, and every week you get to pick up locally grown, organic, just-picked produce that still radiates life and earth. But what happens if you’re just too busy to cook for yourself? Over the course of the season the vegetables can start to pile up in the fridge. You start to feel guilty throwing away the soggy bok choi in the back of the vegetable crisper, and dread the next influx of fresh vegetables that will be piled onto last week’s unused produce.
Sweet Deliverance, a new business run by a Natural Gourmet Institute grad, Kelly Geary, offers a solution for busy New Yorkers. You pay for a CSA share. Geary will pick it up for you, prepare wholesome fresh meals, and deliver them to your door at a time that works for you - for an extra weekly fee of $250. Local food, and home cooked meals, with no work by you! It’s the ultimate in no-fuss, locally-grown convenience. And honestly, it creeps me out.
Read more »
With Shavuot on the horizon, many Jews are preparing for fillings of blintzes and cheesecake. Dairy products (as Eric noted below in his post “Got Shavuot?“) have a number of intimate connections with the festivals that marks, among other things, the giving of the Torah to the Israelites at Sinai. But what are we to make of it that so much of the world’s population is unable to digest lactose, the sugar in milk products?
Years ago, while waiting for the ice cream truck to come by the neighborhood, I recall a friend who would ritualistically take his “dairy pills.” While less painful than the insulin injections that another friend surrendered to, I was puzzled at his body’s intolerance as well as his reason to continue eating milk products if it caused such problems. Little did I know that so much of the world’s population is lactose intolerant, figures hovering between the 66-90 percent mark.
Read more »
There’s a spectacularly successful genre in publishing, the pilgrimage/immersion first person. My favorites, “I was a miserable 20-something and cooked my way through Julia Child” (Julie and Julia, by Julie Powell), and “I was a miserable divorcee and traveled the world.” (Eat, Pray, Love, by Elizabeth Gilbert) Variations include, reading the encyclopedia or living biblically, and the forthcoming “Swish: My Quest to Become the Gayest Man Alive” by this gorgeous genius.
I love a good quest. I have cooked entirely round meals. In every category of clothing - shirt, shoes, socks, etc. - I own at least one item that is crossing-guard orange. I think these narratives amount to a healthy kind of OCD. They can give shape to our lives.
In the past week, the NYTimes has treated us to two previews of the next addition to the library: my year of living locally and conscientiously. Sub-headlined “The Year Without Toilet Paper,” the book will soon be known as “No Impact,” from venerable publisher FSG.
Bleccch.
Read more »
Many, many years ago, my father and mother took their first ever trip to Las Vegas. They were returning to their room after breakfast, and a waiter was in the elevator, with a room service cart…and on the tray with their food was a bottle of Scotch.
My mom, never one to keep things to herself, exclaimed “Scotch for breakfast?”
Without missing a beat, the waiter looked up, and said, “Lady…first time in Vegas?”
Read more »
This just came to my inbox–and begs some unpacking. The ad boasts “Stay fit, keep Kosher.” …But am I missing something about where the first part of that slogan fits in? (Click the pic for a better view of it.)
So rather than let my skepticism get away with me, I checked out their web site which is very patriotic light blue motif with “healthy” written here or there. Complete with advice from a certified nutritionist, perhaps it wasn’t so bad. But there’s a small devil in the fine print:
Read more »
Cookbooks, Cooking, Food Writing, Humor, Kosher, Meat, On The Web, Politics, Rant!, Recipes, Vegetarian
