I would like to appologize in advance to any Jew, non-Jew or non-Jew raisisng jewish children (and the like) if the following is offensive…but as you ingest it, please try to place yourself in our shoes, and reflelct on “our” history (of endless persuctuion) before drawing your own conclusion…I truly believe that if you do so, you too will undertsand).

I have never replied to any blog or forum in my life, but upon reading your posting, I was taken aback, distraught and struck by a sentiment of fear…I fully agree that when it comes to Jews and non Jews, We (the jews) should endeavor to make a kiddush H-shem, and treat them with dignity, for we are not here to pass judgement: we should never create an antipathy of “US vs Them” (although without generalizing, for many of “them”, this is a sentiment they mutually share, and thus the foundation for the history of (escalated)Anti-Semitism). However, as an orthodox Jew, to hear another Jew (and one who represents Jewish outreach) be so “OKAY”, and at ease with the frightening truth that in many communities, they are becoming as you state “the future of Jewish continuity”; To recognize that this may be becoming the reality is one thing (and should create a feeling of GREAT loss and sadness- making many of this generations grandparents and great grandparents turn in their graves)….but to encourage and boast it as a time to “ be welcoming” is in many ways a “Silent Holocaust” H’V.

Baruch H-shem for the “orthodox” for whom many reform and conservative strive to bash at every opportunity….for were it not for them, there soon would no longer be an issue of “us vs them…because THE “US” would BE NO MORE….and we would be what many of them throughout history tried so feverishly to realize “ANNIHILATED”!!! (does this strike any fear???)

P.S: back to the point of that forum in the first place- Purim “mishloach manot”…it too does not need to follow the “trends”, but rather fulfill the true MITZVAH of giving at least 2 ready to eat food items, which have a different “bracha” for each(such as crackers(mezonot) and cheese(shehakol); wine borei peri hagefen) and fruit(usuallu haetz, some ha”adama)…to at least 2 different people…and the greater mitzvah is to give money to the needy- just enough to purchase a small meal).
No one says it shouldn’t be fun, or you cant have a theme, but remember not to lose track of its real purpose (as commanded through OUR history).

I beleieve there is a purpose for everything in life…and so i did not “stumble” upon this website and this discussion for nothing!!

Derisive humor is more of a year-round staple of our people than matzah, hamantaschen, or even that great blessing sour cream. If the women in your group see the post, they’ll probably recognize that.

Thank you very much for commenting and sharing your perspective from your work with Mothers Circle. I will respond here since this is where you started the discussion.

I definitely hear what you are saying, and fully agree that the Jewish community at large does quite poorly when it comes to inviting non-Jews to learn about Judaism.

I myself am the child of an interfaith marriage, and was always grateful that my Reform synagogue growing up was so welcoming to my non-Jewish father, even though he had no intention of converting.

I sincerely apologize if the comment about non-Jews was offensive to your Moms or other non-Jews. I can see how it could be read either as something tongue-and-cheek, or as offensive. Perhaps, though, you may see where I am coming from differently, given my own personal connection to the non-Jewish community.

I am very glad to know that the Mothers Circle listserv exists and serves what I believe is a generally overlooked need, given the non-segregated society that you mentioned. Thanks for sharing.

Preston

I thought the idea of marketing “niche” mishloach manot was really funny and I thought it was a fun idea to write about planning gifts that play off people’s personalities.

I want to take issue, though, with the basket you suggested for non-Jews. I’m the moderator for the Mothers Circle listserve, a group for non-Jewish women raising Jewish children. The women on the list have put serious muscle into learning about Judaism – many are even more knowledgeable than their Jewish partners.

The stereotype about non-Jews that you mentioned – that they don’t know the difference between Jewish holidays – was clearly meant to be a goofy joke, but it comes at a time in our community when it resonates with some serious themes. As I know firsthand from moderating this list, it’s often assumed that intermarried Jewish families don’t understand Judaism. Even when it’s meant as a joke, a comment about being an outsider to Jewish life can pack serious sting for someone going out of their way to support a community that isn’t supportive in return.

Each of us can think of someone we know who would find it hilarious and someone who it would sting, but this is about where our community is at in our history. We no longer live in a segregated society, and “Non-Jews” are no longer “Not Our Kind” – they’re our parents, grandparents, grandchildren, friends, and the future of Jewish continuity. Now is not the time to make “Us vs. Them” jokes, it’s the time to be welcoming.

Before reading your post, I recommended that the women on my listserve visit JCarrot.org. I hope, for their sake, that they don’t read your post and find yet another dig that despite their devotion to Jewish life, they’re still assumed to be outsiders.

I’d be happy to talk more about this with you if you’d like – I know your joke wasn’t meant to open up this can of worms, but I’m looking out for my Moms!

Pippi Kessler
National Coordinator of the Mothers Circle
Jewish Outreach Institute
pkessler@JOI.org